Barnabas File

Since many people are still not familiar with the coaching process, I usually begin the first session with a client giving a quick overview including the fact that the process is client-centered, conversations are confidential, and coaching is not counseling.    Therapy or counseling is very important and sometimes a person is not only being coaching around growth issues but he or she may also be seeing a counselor for deeper personal concerns. The diagram from a coaching organization gives some clarity about the differences between coaching (or “life coaching”) and counseling (or “therapy”) as well as areas of commonality. Here is what coaches do: Coaches do not represent themselves as therapists.  Their work with the client is future oriented and does not deal with issues such as grief, anger, and loss.   Coaches not only seek but need the client’s cooperation in order for the coaching relationship to be productive for the client....

In life or leadership coaching, we often make a distinction between our process and that used by athletic coaches.  This may be because the image of coaches who appear driven to succeed at any cost. For example, the late Vince Lombardi is reported to have said, “Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing.”   But Lombardi also said,  “Leaders are made, they are not born. They are made by hard effort, which is the price which all of us must pay to achieve any goal that is worthwhile.”  All types of coaches can agree to that statement.  We can see similarities between the two processions especially if we perceive the role of the athletic coach being to help the athlete reach her or his full potential.  This is what life coaches do as well. For example, both types of coaches recognize the potential in those with whom they work.  They stand on the side and observe abilities that have not been developed and skills t...

Sometimes I struggle to define what I do as a coach or even the proper descriptor to use.   Although I usually say that my specialty is clergy coaching, this is really a subset under the practice of “life coaching.”     One source defines a life coach as “a professional who helps you reach a goal or make a change in life.”   What can a coach help you to achieve?  One list suggests the following: Become more accountable.  The task of a life coach is not to hold a person accountable but to help a person develop his or her own accountability structures—those reminders, guides, or supports that are sustainable after the coaching relationship ends. Save time and gets faster results.  Working with a coach allows a person to focus and get down to the hard work of change.  The coaching relationship is very intentional and designed to help the client achieve what is most important to that person. Saves money.  In the lo...