Barnabas File

"You never change things by fighting existing reality. To change something, build a new reality that makes the existing reality obsolete."--R. Buckminster Fuller Reality is a funny thing.  If the two of us look at the same picture, read the same article, or observe the same interactions between two or more people, each of us might well come away with very different conclusions.  This is because everyone brings his or her own perspective to the situation.  The perspective we carry with us has been developed over many years through various life experiences.   Sometimes our perspective on reality is what keeps us sane.  At the same time, having a certain perspective on reality does not make one’s viewpoint “right.” For example, I had a conversation with someone after the Presidential election and commented, “I think many people voted based on their fears.”  My friend responded, “No, this was all about power and keeping certai...

In life or leadership coaching, we often make a distinction between our process and that used by athletic coaches.   This may be because the image of coaches who appear driven to succeed at any cost.   For example, the late Vince Lombardi is reported to have said, “Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing.”   But Lombardi also said, “Leaders are made, they are not born. They are made by hard effort, which is the price which all of us must pay to achieve any goal that is worthwhile.”  All types of coaches can agree to that statement. We can see similarities between the two processions especially if we perceive the role of the athletic coach being to help the athlete reach her or his full potential.  This is what life coaches do as well. For example, both types of coaches recognize the potential in those with whom they work.  They stand on the side and observe abilities that have not been developed and skills that can be s...

One of the questions that comes up in coach training is, “How do you coach someone who doesn’t want to be coached?’’  My usual answer is, “You don’t.”  Perhaps it would be more accurate to say that you can’t coach someone who does not want to be coached. The client in a coaching relationship must have a growth mindset; that is, the person must realize that he or she is responsible, creative, and capable.  If a client tells me that he or she is incapable of change, there is no point in continuing the conversation.  I can ask questions, encourage the client to seek clarity, and even push a bit, but I cannot motivate him or her to grow. There are situations where an employer, a supervisor, or a personnel committee will approach a coaching professional and say, “This person needs a coach and we would like for you to work them.” How does a coach handle this process? First, ask the initiating person or group the reason for believing the person needs to be ...

In the introduction to Learning Leadership , the authors—James M. Kouzes and Barry Z. Posner-- share an anecdote. They typically ask a group of 50 people who have come together for leadership development, “How many of you think of yourself as a leader?”  Usually only about 10 percent raise their hands.  Most participants fail to think of themselves as leaders.  This book is designed to help individuals to break the mythological barrier that leadership is only reserved for a special few. If you have read the authors’ The Leadership Challenge or Christian Reflections on The Leadership Challenge , you are familiar with their model of The Five Practices of Exemplary Leadership and their Leadership Practices Inventory (LPI).  There is little new here as far as the model goes, but the purpose of this volume to serve as a self-directed guide to becoming an exemplary leader based on the model.  Each chapter is short enough to be read in a few minutes, bu...

My friend is chair of the Deacon body in her Baptist church in a neighboring state.  She shared with me the struggle they were experiencing over clarifying the role of deacons in the church.  Is it one of administration and authority or service and spiritual guidance?  I recommended that she obtain a copy of Exemplars:  Deacons as Servants and Spiritual Leaders .  I think she will find it a valuable resource for illumination and discussion. Although described in the introductory chapter as a “workbook,” I would rather call this book a resource for personal and group development.  The content is rich in information and each chapter includes questions for individual reflection and group conversation. The book is built upon three pillars.  First, who do deacons need to be?  Deacons—like all believers--are unique creations of God, recipients of God’s grace, and spiritually gifted servants.  These chapters are a reminder of one’s iden...

The Merriman-Webster Dictionary defines “politics” as “ the art or science of government.”  A friend and mentor once explained to me, “Politics is simply who gets what and when they get it.” My friend’s definition is much closer to what we find in an expanded definition on Wikipedia: Politics   (from Greek : πολιτικός politikos, definition "of, for, or relating to citizens") is the process of making decisions applying to all members of each group. More narrowly, it refers to achieving and exercising positions of governance — organized control over a human community, particularly a state . Furthermore, politics is the study or practice of the distribution of power and resources within a given community (a usually hierarchically organized population) as well as the interrelationship(s) between communities. I bring this up not to rehash the Presidential election but to consider politics as part of leadership. Politics is not in itself a bad thin...